Using Sex To Change The World

It’s a well-known fact that mother nature is incredibly cruel when it comes to the sex drive of our species with men hitting their sexual peak in their late teens and women in their 30’s. Rather than simply resign ourselves to that fact, why not use it to our advantage?

18 year old boys should only be allowed to have sex with Cougars.

Even further to that, all boys should lose their V-Cards to older women. I am serious. I have been giving this a lot of thought and I genuinely think I am on to something.

As part of the “privileged white male” arm of society, it disturbs me to no end to hear about the unbelievable things that happen in our society that the white guys seem to get away with. Stories about college students raping and getting away with it. Politicians and Hollywood types taking advantage of women and getting a slap on the wrist, meanwhile there are people of visible minorities rotting in jail for far less.

I’m not trying to get on a soap box and rat out my race saying we deserve worse, I know there are a lot of people in jail regardless of color that deserve to be there and a great deal of them did some truly horrific things to get there and I hope they suffer for it. But what if there were a way to curb some of the behavior early? I’m not talking about intervention programs or scared straight initiatives that don’t really work, I am talking about something to radically change our society for the better, forever.

Real sex education.

I grew up in the 80’s and 90’s. Sex ed for us was learning a bit about anatomy and scaring the bejesus out of us with AIDS and HIV. Real sex ed for us involved dirty magazines and finding Dad’s stash of VHS movies. My kids are all growed up now (my daughter will be 18 at the end of August) and their sex ed involved learning a bit about anatomy and hygiene, but mostly hearing from the other kids where to find easy porn on the internet. My big talk to my kids centered around on how real sex was not what you saw on the internet, but more of an intimate exchange between two people who love each other.

But let’s be real- that’s crap too.

Sex feels far too good to only do it just to procreate with the one we want to spend our lives with- at least for a lot of us. We all want sex to be loving and meaningful but most of the sex we have in our lives is anything but. Even once we find “the one”, we spend less time having sex once we are married than we typically do getting to that point. And that’s not a bad thing, it’s just kind of the way it is.

As a parent, there is literally nothing you can do to teach your children to be good in bed. Nothing you can do to show them how to be a good lover. We don’t talk to our kids that way, nor do we ask our parents about that kind of thing. It just doesn’t happen.

“Hey Dad, what’s your trick to making mom cum harder?” Nope. Whole lotta nope.

As a society, the more we learn about each other, the more progress we achieve. There was a time minorities couldn’t use public water fountains. Sure seems ridiculous by todays standards but there was a time this was considered normal and acceptable, just as it seems normal and acceptable for the behavior of my gender to abuse women and then victim shame.

Yes, we have come along way from beating our wives if dinner wasn’t ready when the man came home from work, but why are women still expected to have to defend themselves any time they are walking alone? Why is it ok for them to always be afraid?

As a species, I feel we don’t know enough about each other to be able to truly respect the other gender and I think its social taboos that are keeping us back. So let’s talk about stripping them away, starting with what we call “sex ed”.

Imagine if you would, a teenage boy having sex for the first time with a teenage girl. Most of us have been there/done that. At that point in our lives what do we know? Penis gets hard, goes in vagina and the man ejaculates. It’s embarrassing for us guys because we don’t know any better. It’s painful for girls, but they are taught that eventually it will feel better, just let him finish. Over time, we learn the hard way what works, what doesn’t and eventually- how to really enjoy it. But what if we could skip the awkward and painful stages?

Now imagine a teenage boy having sex for the first time not with a teenage girl, but an older woman- one in her mid to late 30’s, the sexual prime of her life being able to teach that young virgin how to treat a woman. How to make her wet BEFORE driving inside of her. Teaching him that it’s not the destination but the journey that makes sex enjoyable. Teaching him to last longer than 30 seconds and showing him not just what his penis can do, but what he needs to do to truly please a woman.

What happens the first time he tries to thump his chest and show that cougar that he is the boss? She is going to shut him down so fast and so hard that he is going to cry for his mother because that is NOT how you treat women. No teenage girl has the power to do that let alone the confidence or experience. As boys, we need to be taught that it’s about making sure SHE is ready, lubricated (naturally or otherwise) and that her satisfaction and enjoyment need to be a focus for us long before we stick it inside of her.

Think about it… generations of men taught how to treat their sexual partner right from the start, as opposed to doing it wrong for the first few years of their sexual lives.

How many rapes, abuses and deaths would be prevented by teaching young men how to treat women properly before they become real men? Imagine the first few generations of girls growing up unafraid of what might happen. Sounds almost too easy, right?

Now let’s look at the other side… teenage girls sleeping only with older men. Suddenly it seems a little too crazy- but hear me out. Assuming we want to have a society built out of respect for each other, we need to be able to teach everyone the same level of respect. Besides, if all the teenage boys are sleeping with older women, who are the teenage girls sleeping with?

In order for this to work, the “teachers” would need to be vetted very carefully. People who have the morals to do this for the betterment of society and not in it to get their rocks off sleeping with kids. There would be a very fine line that these “teachers” would have to walk between education and sex with minors, so they would have to be specially selected, trained and of such high moral standards that they wouldn’t become predators themselves.

But think about generations of young women whose first time having sex isn’t a dry penis thrust inside of her, biting her lip in pain just waiting for it to be over, but of someone laying with her showing her how to feel good about herself and her body. Learning that sex is something that requires some work ahead of time to get ready and lubricated- naturally or otherwise, before allowing anything inside of her. Learning that the point is not to just lay there and wait til its over- but that she has a right to enjoyment and satisfaction too. Learning where her happy spots are and how to ask for what feels good instead of just laying there wondering when it will be over.

Girls growing up with a positive self-image and sense of worth because their first times were positive experiences teaching them just that.

Boys growing up understanding how to treat a partner with respect and not a sense of entitlement because their first times were teaching them what it meant to treat their partner properly. What could we as a society achieve with these kinds of people running the world?

No more immature, adolescent judgmental garbage about who is sleeping with who, who is a slut and “why are you with THAT person?”. Why not create a society where sex is treated more like learning good manners than what simply happens, and we never talk about it?

How crazy does it sound now?